Join me in Snarkville

Being snarky is the only thing that makes this place enjoyable. After all, if you can't laugh at others, how do you feel superior?

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Location: Snarkville, Left Coast

Treat me no differently than you would any Queen. I rule my Snarky kingdom with some kind of dignity, but I refuse to add grace. I rule with my Prince of a husband (he can't be King, since he married into his royal title) and my son the Duke of Snarkville.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

I live to serve

Yes, I may be your Queen of Snarkville, but I live to serve you my gentle readers. I have answers to all your questions (recently left in comments) and a few answers to questions you haven't even asked yet. Please feel free to ask more if you need answers of any of life's little queries. As you see, I live to serve.

From our Grenidine Girl:
Yarn says, life's not so bad, you've got me to love you. And the yarn doesn't charge you or bill your health insurance nor does it require to be fed, diapered or clothed.
True, yarn does make life better. However, she is a cruel mistress who will not tolerate being cheated on with anyone else. Have you tried to knit while thinking of something upseting? How many rows did you have to TINK out? I can share yarn time with some other things, but they must be good happy things, like TV, travel, petting, chatting, or snuggling. I however, can not be mad and knit. This leads me to one of the Prince's favorite sayings, "Don't _____, angry." Fill in your own blank -- it works for just about everything.

From our Sarah HB:
Um, can you knit him some socks?
No, I can not knit my father socks. There are three basic problems here. One, I have NO idea what size to knit as I've not been close enough to my Dad's feet in years. Two, he only wears black socks, boring, and I'd be forced to die just from the yarn purchase alone. Three, I can't knit socks very fast -- it would take a few weeks, and we have like DAYS here. I'm thinking I need to bring food of some type.

From our Bad Mommy:
Maybe the Duke would like to come over and work out his feelings by biting C? I'm off tomorrow and would be happy to take the Duke off your hands for a bit if you'd like a nap.

Thank you so much for the offer of a nap and some sitting time. I would have taken you up on hanging out on your day off -- BUT, I have no way of contacting you outside of comments -- I'll correct that tomorrow night at Knit Night, I assure you. For now, Duke has not bitten another child. I'm not sure at what point you get chewed on enough to believe that this an acceptable way to react, but I fear it may be coming. I've warned the school if it happens, I'm going to walk in the door and tell them, "You taught him to bite, YOU un-teach him to bite. This is NOT my problem." However, Bad Mommy, if you want to grab coffee this afternoon, I'll meet you in Novato.

From our Polly:
I'm sorry Duke is so tasty-- is it the same biter or as word gotten out that he is so succulent?

I guess we should stop bathing him in chocolate, huh? You know, Duke takes after his father who can eat and eat and eat and still no part of him will hang over his pants. Makes me sick. So, it isn't like Duke is plump and juicy. It is not the same biter, seems to be multiple different kid. Lately, it has been in response to Duke trying to take something that another kid had and Duke just took and didn't ask.

From my most wonderful Secret Pal (I'd link to you if I knew your blog -- care to share?):
About the biting, since Duke's almost three see if he can be moved to a room with 3 year olds.

Duke can move to the 3 year old room when he's potty trained. At the rate we are going, it will be a bit -- and probably past the age of 3 for him. So, we are kind of stuck. I am however, going to get dressed here shortly and run down there to observe to see if I see anything that might help. Probably won't, but at least I'm being helpful, right?

On to questions you didn't ask or probably care to know:
  • Duke is better. Yup, less than 6 coughs yesterday all within seconds of drinking a little milk -- so I think he's still got some phlegm, but nothing like it was. I'm canceling the doctor's appointment and sending him to school.
  • I am not. I slept SO well last night I couldn't believe it. I actually got a full night's sleep -- thank you Nyquil. I'm on cup of coffee number 2 just to keep my eyes open. However, I could make bank doing phone sex, because I'm totally the sexy voice lady right now.
  • My stitches are not comfortable. It seems that while I would have bet that this part of my back doesn't move -- it MOVES with every single thing I do. I can feel them pulling and it isn't fun. The Queen Mum tells me that as it heals it will actually feel worse because of pulling. ICK. I'm done now, put a fork in me.
  • I leave on Friday, folks!!! I become a jet setter once again to head to the East Coast, from whence I came, then on a ship, then to Club Med. Yes, I live the life. Who wants me to pack them in my suitcase? Any bets on how much yarn I'll take?
  • There are TWO entries for Pride of Hawai'i stuff. TWO folks??? Get your entries in before I get back from my trip and I'll have Prince pick in a winner. At this point, I may split up the stuff and make both winners -- so hello, folks, if you want me to score decent crap from this trip, you need to encourage me!!!!!
  • I will be at Knit Night this Thursday -- even though I'll be heading to the airport at 5am on Friday. I am hoping to be more over this bug -- we think if I have what Duke did, I'll be done soon enough. I'm taking that Airborne stuff that is supposed to help and while it isn't the tastiest, I'm doing ok and it may actually be helping.


Blogger Sarah said...

Have a good trip.

Good luck with finding a gift!

9:54 AM  
Anonymous Niki said...

It's not the chocolate you bathe Duke in that makes him so tasty - it's the yogurt and Nilla wafers!

10:24 AM  

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